Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
