I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Hippo gnu deer
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
