How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
