when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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