Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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