hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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