ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Randomize
