Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
