Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
