There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
