So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
After tacos, we're chasing women.
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