He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
