i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
