thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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