KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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