what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
