It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
