"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
