Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I love having hate sex.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
