Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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