i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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