it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Vodka?
Forever.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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