didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
