Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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