can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Congratulations! We have a period
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
