Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
