Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
