At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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