Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I want to stick my p in your. b.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
