Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize