I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
