Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
