I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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