Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
