Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Randomize
