and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
