yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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