he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
