Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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