I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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