I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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