Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
