i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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