Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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