This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
