he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
