Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
