Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Randomize
