I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize