Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
